accept this sandwich as a gesture of solidarity.

anneretic:

“Huh. That was weird,” Dean comments, once they ganked the thing. He laughs just a touch away from hysterically because, man oh man, that was fucking weird.

“You think it… funny?” There’s a tightness in Castiel’s otherwise neutral voice that sobers him right up. It’s not anger, but perhaps curiosity? Even dismay?

“C’mon Cas, I didn’t wake up this morning expecting to run into Eve, and Eve chewing on a Deansicle, no less.” Dean hadn’t realized it was far more gruesome to watch, than to actually experience, the mother of all monsters with her monstrous jaw and creepily-tiny teeth clamped on your neck.

“That creature wasn’t Eve.”

“Yeah, I know,” Dean whistles at that stroke of good fortune. “Now that we’re in her territory, I reckon she must be what? Statue-of-Liberty scale?”

“It was a boggart.”

“No such things.” But Dean couldn’t be sure. Already in purgatory, he’d seen dozens that had formerly been “no such things”: fiery djinns and red-eyed minotaurs, worms as long and thick as his hand and white as snow, trees that sighed and wept and dripped blood.

“You know how tulpas are made — and there are millions of fans of that franchise.”

“Yeah, Sammy-like kids who believe in things they can’t even see.” (He neglected to add that angels were among those things, but no need to bring that up. And, christ, he missed Sam.)

“Didn’t know you were that afraid of Eve, Cas. So what if she can ‘effectively render you powerless’, you’ve taken on bigger fish before. And human too.”

Castiel speaks just before the silence becomes uncomfortable. (Not that it’s quiet, there were yips and yowls everywhere in purgatory, the earth churning, unseen rivers that bubbled so loud at night that you’d think he’d never go thirsty. But he did, he did.)

“Angels — we’re not made for fear, Dean.” Of course, weapons weren’t supposed to be. “We thought it a very human emotion, or something Lucifer ‘whipped up’ in hell. For corrupting humans.” Still the airquotes, Dean can’t help but roll his eyes, inwardly and not without affection. “During the war in heaven, I never thought of fear, not for myself or the other angels, not even for you Winchesters.”

“Ouch.”

“That was until I saw Eve attack you, and be powerless to do anything should you turn, or die, and end up here. In purgatory. Then I was very much afraid. I supposed that’s all this unfortunate being —” Castiel refers to the smoky carcass. ” — could latch on to.”

And what Dean say to that? What could he say whenever this comes up — all for you, everything for you, the moment he touched you in hell he was lost — it was true, sure, but it didn’t make it fair. Dean didn’t ask for it, Castiel didn’t blame him for it, and yet Castiel’s high regard of him remained a burden heavy as love.

He deflects instead. “Touching, Cas.”

(Source: bluerubyrock)

euclase:

it’s not done yet. but kitties!